Always Dating the “Wrong” People? Experts Recommend this to Date the “Right One”. We’ve all been there – the pain of a heartbreak. A lot of us probably believe that love makes us irrational, and there’s a science to it.


Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist who spoke in TedTalk about “The brain in love,” explained that romantic interactions dramatically increase our dopamine system. This is especially true when you have sex with your partner wherein oxytocin and vasopressin increases.


These two neurochemicals are closely linked to love attachment. If you ever wonder why the emotional part of your brain triumphs over the rational part of it, you got your answer.

It’s difficult to be emotionally attached to someone who is “wrong for you.” We all have different definitions of whether someone is wrong for someone or not. But in general, it should mean that someone can’t or won’t give you your wants and needs.


Always Dating the “Wrong” People?


If you want to break this cycle, here are some tips on avoiding being with the wrong people. (and you can also check-out our previous post on the best dating apps for 2020)


1. Have a clear dating goal


The first thing you need to do is to know what you want. We might have different wants in different periods in our life. For example, you might not be looking for a serious, long-term relationship yet during your early 20s, but it might change when you’re already in your 30s or 40s.


Most of us tend to go on dates and see where it goes. And while spontaneity is welcome, there’s nothing wrong with identifying your dating goals too. This can help you protect yourself so that you won’t end up emotionally, physically, or financially hurt.


Setting your dating goal can help you weed out those who do not qualify for it. Therefore, sparing you from being in a relationship with the “wrong one.”


2. Know your boundaries and standards


Now that you have set your dating goal, you will know whether what you like is being in a long-term relationship, just a casual fling, or maybe just for fun. It will then be easier for you to set your boundaries and standards.


Putting it merely, standards represent the things you would say “yes” to while boundaries are things you would say “no.” By being guided by these things, there is a higher chance that you will have a healthy and happy relationship.


Not everyone you will date will have the same dating goal as you. Those who should advance to the next stage are those who can respect your standards and boundaries.


3. Know your date more


Most relationships fail because they rush the dating process. Rushing the dating process means getting intimate with your date (not just sex) without even knowing them.

Take time to know your date’s personality – what kind of personality they have, how they act on things, and their perspectives. This is a way for you to know whether you are compatible or not.


4. Don’t drink too much alcohol on your first few dates


A study showed a strong relationship between alcohol consumption and having sex during the first date. While it is good to loosen up a little, this might lead to poor judgment.

If you are prepared to have sex or fall in love with some, it would be best to limit your alcohol consumption to about two glasses during your first date.


5. Talk about important things early on


They say it’s taboo to talk about marriage and children early on in the relationship. But this seems to be a trap everyone falls into. Imagine having invested in your partner only to find out they are not in for it?

Remember, the only people you will scare away when having these conversations are the people who are not right for you.


6. Learn how to move on ruthlessly


The longer you stay in a relationship, the longer you prolong your agony. If you think you have enough reason to say that he/she is not the right one for you, then it is best to move on. We know that doing it is better said than done but believe that it will do you good in the long run.

Author: Blogger